Have you noticed that it sometimes feels like there are multiple voices in your head, all talking to you in completely different ways? There might be a voice that’s kind and compassionate, and another that’s really critical and doesn’t allow any room for mistakes. When you’re trying something new and adventurous, maybe there’s a voice that’s excited and thrilled at the opportunity, and another that’s terrified and wants to abort the mission as quickly as possible.

These often-contradictory voices are part of what Internal Family Systems (IFS) teaches us about our relationship with our Self. These inner voices aren’t signs of confusion – they’re reflections of the different parts within us, each trying to help in its own way.

What Internal Family Systems (IFS) Teaches Us About Our Inner World

IFS is a therapeutic approach that views our inner world as composed of many “parts” rather than a single, unified voice. Each part holds a perspective and a role – sometimes helpful, sometimes protective, sometimes misunderstood.

Enter Celeste

A few months ago, my sister bought me a Nintendo Switch, and it opened up a world of gaming that I had only watched from afar as a child. One of the games (that quickly became my favourite) was Celeste.

For those unfamiliar with the game, Celeste follows Madeline, who struggles with anxiety and life in general, and decides to climb a mountain as a challenge to herself. Over the course of her climb, she meets many other characters, the most daunting of which is a figure that looks just like her (but more sinister). This character doesn’t have a name – we just know her as “A Part of You.”

Throughout the game, this part of Madeline makes her climb much more challenging and gets her into trouble on multiple occasions. She seems to truly hate this part of herself and wants it to leave her alone. As a player, I, too, got frustrated with this character. She made a mess of things constantly, making an already difficult game even more difficult.

Towards the end of the game, however, I realized that it was always about Madeline’s relationship with this part of her.

Spoiler alert to whomever it matters: Madeline eventually realizes that this part that’s been causing her so much trouble, and is so critical of her, is really just scared and trying to protect them both at every step. She tells Madeline that she’s not going to succeed and should give up because the idea of actually failing is terrifying.

I couldn’t help but see the parallels between this and what I tell my clients in our IFS work – that the part of you that is mean to you, holds you back, or leads you to doubt yourself, also requires empathy and curiosity.

Compassion, Not Control

IFS holds that we’re all made up of different parts – essentially different voices or characters that exist within us. These parts all play a role in our lives, but some can get stuck in old, unhelpful patterns.

There’s a part of Madeline that wants to climb this mountain and motivates her to grow, and another part that’s scared and is trying to ensure her safety. We tend to get very frustrated with these often-negative parts, but at one point in our lives, we needed them. Eventually, as we grow, they can hold us back.

Madeline’s part, too, sends her flying all the way to the bottom of the mountain when she gets really close to her final summit. After a long, drawn-out battle with this part, Madeline realizes that she still needs her but doesn’t have to give up control to her. Together, they work on climbing the mountain again – with added strength, because the part is now helping her.

Working With, Not Against, Our Parts

Similarly, having empathy for our parts and getting curious about them doesn’t have to mean giving in to their destructive tendencies. Instead, it gives us a chance to understand the role they’ve been trying to play in our lives and find ways to integrate them into the version of ourselves that exists today.

In IFS therapy, we learn that every part has a positive intent – even when its strategies are painful or outdated. IFS encourages this dialogue between our Self and our many parts. The Self is the calm, compassionate core that can guide your different parts, just like Madeline learns to attend to the part of her that’s scared.

Your Mountain and Your Parts

Like Madeline, what part of you is climbing your own version of a mountain? Which part of you is cheering you on? Which part of you is doubtful and afraid?

Imagine noticing each of these parts and thanking them for the role they play in your life. Try to get curious about how you can help your less favourable parts play that role differently.

Sometimes, healing isn’t about climbing faster – it’s about learning to listen to every part that’s walking beside you.

If a video game character can make peace with her inner critic, maybe there’s room for us to do the same.

If you’re interested in exploring IFS in your mental health journey, feel free to reach out below!